What is one fear or goal that you would like to conquer?
But despite really enjoying writing and really wanting to get my stories out there, sometimes I struggle to write at all for weeks, even months. I don’t think it’s writer’s block, as I don’t have a lack of ideas during this time. It’s more like when I think about writing down my ideas, I’m suddenly crippled by a feeling of dread and I can’t even face bringing up the document to look at my work or even writing a few lines on paper. I just avoid it and do something else. I think it stems from a fear of not being good enough. I’m afraid that what I write is utter rubbish and that I’ll read some of it back and cringe with embarrassment. So sometimes I can’t bring myself to even try and this is holding me back.
Slyvia Plath said ‘the worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt’ and I think that’s true. I know this attitude is counter-productive and it has become a self-fulfilling prophesy. I avoid writing because of a feeling of inadequacy, but this means I’m not practising my skills and so my writing is probably not at the standard it could be. I also know that suppressing the urge to write affects me negatively-I start feeling frustrated and unfulfilled when I don’t express myself on paper. So I’m currently working on trying to overcome these feelings. I think the key is to try not to think too much and just put my bum in the seat and write, without censoring myself. Doing NaNoWriMo has helped with this, as during the challenge you’re encouraged to bash out the words without worrying too much about quality. I’m trying to continue with this mentality throughout the year, remembering that there will be plenty of time to edit later.
This last year has been a turning-point for me in terms of my career and relationship and I’m now hoping to keep that momentum going and conquer some of my writing goals too. This could be my best year yet!
Do you have a fear that’s holding you back from accomplishing something?